A NEW YEAR
The new year is here and moving already, holding within it possibilities of growth and achievement. While the excitement of the holidays triggers a movement collectively to reflect on the year that passed and to feel inspired to overcome barriers that are still holding us back, after a while, we get back in the groove of things and fall victim to the same cycles that we were once so motivated to change, all of a sudden a year passing without significant progress like we had hoped and worked towards. Once the celebration dies down, and the vision gets lost amongst daily distractions, if intentional actions aren't a daily effort and choices follow previous habits, things remain the same. Suffering remains the same. It doesn't have to be this way.
Habits, traits, choices, perspectives. They all hold within them a chance to take your power back and a chance to make everyday life better. It's not an all of a sudden, "I think, therefore I am", but a gradual process of pausing, noticing, and changing, over and over again. At some point, it becomes second nature to incorporate a daily experience that is optimized by awareness, making decisions that reflect what is most important to you. One habit can reek havoc in a familiar way that we get used to and it can feel like it is our fault when we know different, yet choose the same. Ultimately though, mistakes are inevitable, and the commitment to remain tied into conscious changes is subject to failure at some point. What I'm learning, is for long term change, it's not about how many times you have to find your way back to the path of what you really want, but the way in which you find your way back. It's about consciously deciding what you want your life story to be and giving yourself compassion along the way, knowing perfection is unnecessary and wavering faith is a part of the journey. And most importantly, it's not a race.
Whether you want it to or not, time passes and with every second gone, each moment is gone, another one presenting itself. In my eyes, this is one of the most important choices: to value each breath in and out with wonder, or fight the organic flow of being alive, ruled by your mind and automatic sabotage. I know I'm not the only one, who has reached a point where all I could think about was an ending heartbeat, no longer living in this world to endure the pain of the human condition, believing a future was better off without me in it. Whatever it looks like for you, whatever you're trying to make sense of or master, it can be done. It starts with the belief that things can be different and slowly showing yourself that you are able to access your inner capabilities even when there is resistance. This year can be everything you want it to be. It isn't simple, but it is worth it(or at least you have to believe it is).
